Thursday, November 27, 2008

A Stressful Day

What a day, I dont know where to start.

I have the feeling of utter dread, never have I felt this way before.

I went to FMU for a ctg this morning, they were flat chat, a line up out the door. Waiting about 45 mins then got called in. Normally they leave me on for about 40 mins, today they nly had me on for 10 mins, then the midwife came in said yeah looks ok, you can come off now.

Then I called OB to see if he still wanted to see me, nope see you on Monday. I already had an appointment for 920 Monday morning, then this arvo I get a call to say that he has to cancel his mornings appointment so can I come at 12.30 instead, no problems I say.

When I saw him yesterday bubs had only grown 7 grams, yes 7 miserable grams, in a week!!! My baby is starving to death, I know every day counts, but what happens if I go tomorrow and bubs is gone, that is my greatest fear and its taking its toll.

Everyone I speak to keeps asking why have they not got that baby out yet, I have even packed away the cradle, carseat and the clothes that Ive collected already. I know I need to be positive but right now Im just not.

My baby weights only 735 grams and should be nearing 2kgs, Ive been on bedrest for 3 weeks, bed rest is not working!!!!! Ive relaxed, Ive finished up work, DH is doing the cooking and the cleaning, the growth is not going anywhere, infact 3 weeks ago weight was 660g, its now 735 so not even 100g in 3 weeks!!!!!!

I am stressed, worried, emotional and I am trying my hardest to hold it together.

Ok I better sign off, might go and have a nice caling cup of tea, I bet my BP is climbing just through stress

Kat and Buggalugs

1 comment:

Caroline said...

Oh God Kat, I would go with your instinct, honestly, if you feel baby should come out now then it should. I do too.
it breaks my heart to hear you with so much worrym and that you have packed away the baby things :(
Its not over yet sweetie.
I have been so worried about you and baby lately, in fact you have taken me off my worries atm.
I pray everyday for you, but i think you need to take action too, as the OB doesn't seem to be now. It will not hurt to get a 2nd opinion.
I just hope it all works out and your holding bubs safely and well in your arms.
I am here if you need to chat.
I don't want you to go through what i did :(
xxx